i once loved someone

i once loved someone. you could say his lips were paper that i wanted to write on.

so like all great love stories, it began with a kiss. you never know when it will end, so you kiss him again. through the years you will have kissed his lips a thousand times.

i like you becomes i like you a lot. i like you a lot becomes i love you. i love you becomes, you promise to stay with me? forever and always, right?

you held onto broken fragments of each other, you held each other’s hand firmly — too scared to let go too quickly, your bodies will never miscalculate how to hold each other — even now. such an innocent love story.

the sky always seemed bluer when you together.

the art of kissing suddenly became the art of sex — lovemaking in the 21st century seems almost nonexistent. they leave hickeys on your neck and thighs calming you as property. 

like all bruises though, they disappear.

eventually, you barely even talk. you just get lost in sheets and hold each other until the sun comes up. then you realize that you cannot even recall the last kiss you shared. so do you even kiss anymore? the person you fell in love with — now is just a gradual feeling fading out.

no one writes about this part of the story.

you know something funny though? if we ever did it again — started over.

it would be toxic in my lungs.

death in the flowers lacing my hair.

smoke from my car.

secret dances in dark rooms.

naked bodies as religion. 

open heart surgery by your hands. stitched back together with your words.

whispers of cry in poetry.

love until regret. 

forever that means never.

always thinking of that song.

lips coated with tears and mumbles of pain.

lost without a map.

youth given to soul mates too soon.

tragedy at 2am.

a pillow holding all my apologies. 

hearing your goodbye through our friends.

i would still do everything. the exact same way we messed up the first time. just so you could meet the person i am today — because i am not the same. i would be the one that got away.

so like all great love stories, ours ended with a kiss. this time, we knew it was our ending.

so you kiss him again.

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